Cheesy Mage Pickup Lines


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I'm currently playing in a shadowrun game as a charisma mage who considers himself something of a "lady's man". I'm looking for the cheesiest pick up lines you can think of.

Bonus points for:

Making it magic related
or
Making it somehow shadowrun related

remember, the cheesier the better.

The Exchange

Are you a fireball?
Cause you just blow my mind!

... yeah, that's all I got.


Do you want to touch my magic wand?

Liberty's Edge

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Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game, Starfinder Society Subscriber

Can I cast expeditious retreat on you? Because you'll be running through my mind all day.

Wow you've got cooler curves than the dome version of my wall of ice spell.

Is that a mirror image scroll of me in your pocket? Because I can sure see multiple copies of myself in your pants.

I'd cast black tentacles just to get my, uh, tentacles, on you? Hands, I mean.

You make my heart race like a haste spell.

I researched a new spell just because of you...come enter my globe of vulnerability.

You the center of my arcane focus, and I've got a big pouch of components.

I've got no save against your "power word entrance" spell!

(Insert smooth line about rod of greater extend here)

Can you tell me how you maximize your dominate person spell?

I crafted you this ring of three wishes, but im already tall, dark and handsome.

If I crafted an illusion of my perfect body, would you hold it against you and wiilingly forego your disbelief?

If I disintegrated your armor, revealing your perfect body, would you hold it against me?

Your more perfect than the esoteric formulae required for a contact other plane spell.

Get away from that paladin's lay on hands ability! He's got nothing on my Bigby's Fantastic Groping Hand.

Damn, girl, I may just have to trap you in a powdered silver circle for eternity!


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Are you a mage because you just cast charm person on me?

Are you a summoned spirit because you're out of this world.

Is your astral body as fantastic as your physical body?

*To an ork lady* Do you have HMHVV? Because you just stole my heart

Do you want to see my Lodge.


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Did you just cast Flesh to Stone, cause somethings getting hard.


lol


Somebody must have cast pilfering hand on you, baby, because you stole my heart just now.


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I'm working on a new spell. It's called greater tongues....


If I let you into my tiny hut will you let me into your magnificent mansion?

How did you cast enlarge person in under 12 seconds?

I know both black tentacles AND grease...

I saw this on the discovery channel *baleful polymorph*

Check out Rary's pneumatic enhancer...

... to hell with it. Charm person.


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Mordenkainen's Lubrication?

"Hey baby, I memorized Animate Rope today."


The NPC wrote:

Are you a mage because you just cast charm person on me?

Are you a summoned spirit because you're out of this world.

Is your astral body as fantastic as your physical body?

*To an ork lady* Do you have HMHVV? Because you just stole my heart

Do you want to see my Lodge.

I see what you did there, chummer.

"Let me work my magic on you."

"I study fleshwarping. Wanna see the job perks?"

*Casts Hypnotism*

"I can be anything you want. ANYTHING."


Loving it all so far. real wiz stuff.


From "Order of the Stick" #244:

"...wanna hold my Rod of Lordly Might? If you push the right button, it might extend!"

Shadow Lodge

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Wanna play with my weasel?

Dark Archive

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Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

Dat astral form.


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Tsch please.

The ULTIMATE way to pick up chicks as ANY class is to walk up a sssexxxy~ lady~, look her dead in the eye, and then THIS(Beware! contains weaponized awesome and adult language)

You're welcome ;)

N-dawg out!


"Wanna see me change a wand into a staff? I'll just need you to lay on hands..."


was your daddy a meat burglar


Nothing I can do compares to the magic that you're working on me.

You know, magic tricks are just the beginning of my talents.

Baby you know any polymorph spells? 'cause your shape is magical!

Walk up to her singing "I Put A Spell On You" by Screamin' Jay Hawkins


because it looks like someone stuffed two fine Crystalhue hams down the back of your pants


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If you grab my wand of Unnatural Lust I'll let you Ride the Waves of Ecstasy, and as I Dominate your Fiery Body you are going to Wish for a Time Stop so that the moment of my Stunning Finale may never end.


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Thymus Vulgaris wrote:
If you grab my wand of Unnatural Lust I'll let you Ride the Waves of Ecstasy, and as I Dominate your Fiery Body you are going to Wish for a Time Stop so that the moment of my Stunning Finale may never end.

Clap... clap... clap...


Thymus Vulgaris wrote:


If you grab my wand of Unnatural Lust I'll let you Ride the Waves of Ecstasy, and as I Dominate your Fiery Body you are going to Wish for a Time Stop so that the moment of my Stunning Finale may never end.

Ok, we have a winner.


I'm packing Circle of Protection.
Should I cast Tongues?

Scarab Sages

Let me show you why they call me the magic man.

Silver Crusade

My Ice Spear will knock you off your feet.

Would you like to join me on a Geas/Quest? (said like Gay-ass Quest)


*insert verbal component of charm person here*

Scarab Sages

"Look at my wand of wonder baby! Oh yeah!"

"Did you just put a spell on me? 'cause I'm charmed for sure."

"Let me grab your love wings and ride you into the night!"

Scarab Sages

Googleshng wrote:
*insert verbal component of charm person here*

Or quite possibly "Insert verbal component of charm person here" while pointing at some part of anatomy (either theirs or your own).


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I put the romance in Necromancer.


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Haladir wrote:
I put the romance in Necromancer.

Thanks a lot Haldir.

Boner!? I've got a Bloody Skeleton.


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"I see you cast Wish. Here I am.
"Now it's my turn."


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Hrothdane wrote:
Would you like to join me on a Geas/Quest? (said like Gay-ass Quest)

That isn't charming. That isn't even cheesy. That's ... worth a beating. :)

Credit for nerve, though.


Would you like to see my color spray?

My middle name is "Trid Entertainment."

I saved some dice pool just for you.


There's a reason I'm a snake shaman.

I'll make you wish you had wired reflexes.

I not just a Mage, I'm also an adept.

The Exchange

The Friendly Lich wrote:
Do you want to touch my magic wand?

*shocking grasp*

The Exchange

NobodysHome wrote:

"Wanna see me change a wand into a staff? I'll just need you to lay on hands..."

*signals to the paladins...*

"The Inquisition is IN!"


"You know, honey, I could teleport your underwear three feet to the left with a snap of my fingers?"

"Two words: Bear's Endurance."


"Want to go get a quicky, I know Haste."


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Conman the Bardbarian wrote:
Wanna play with my weasel?

As a lovely weasel familiar of jerk high elf wizard with abysmal Charisma I can confirm that pick up line done real wonders.


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My Hut may be Tiny, but my Manhood's Magnificent.


"Hey babe, did you lose your summoner? Cause you look outta this world."

I'm not sorry. This thread needed to be necro'd for the good of the dating lives of wizards everywhere.


Green Smashomancer wrote:

"Hey babe, did you lose your summoner? Cause you look outta this world."

I'm not sorry. This thread needed to be necro'd for the good of the dating lives of wizards everywhere.

Wizards get dates?


Want to see my "pointy hat" trick?


I approve of this thread necro.

Hey girl, you see that tall tower towards the horizon? Yeah, that's my wizard tower. How about you come inside, and I'll give you a chance to see what it's modelled after.

...

Don't worry, I've prepared Reduce Person just in case it's too big for you to handle.


"Don't worry, babe. I'm a crafter of magical items. No really. You want to see my Rod of Splendor?"


Wanna come back to my place and polish my staff?

I know Rary's Breast Enhancer.

I also know Rary's Telepathic Bondage.

Silver Crusade

Pathfinder Lost Omens, Rulebook Subscriber

The formula or my greatest spell is almost complete! It just needs your contact info


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I'll show you what this Old Light was originally used for;-)

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