Swarm Slurper


Open Call: Design a wondrous item

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RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6 aka Breelo Babblebock

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Swarm Slurper
Aura strong conjuration and evocation; CL 13th
Slot none; Price 8,000 gp; Weight 2 lbs.
Description
This small frog statue is forged from copper and set with two small rubies for eyes. When the command word is spoken, the eyes begin to glow and the mouth of the swarm slurper opens revealing thousands of translucent tongue-like tendrils of force. These tongues of force strike outward and grab individual creatures from one type of Fine or Diminutive swarm within 10 feet. The grabbed creatures are pulled into an extradimensional space within the statue. The mouth closes after five rounds or when 40 hit points of a single type of swarm are contained inside. The eyes of the swarm slurper continue to glow until the swarm is released. The captured creatures of a swarm are released when the mouth opens automatically after 10 minutes or if the command word is spoken. The swarm slurper can be used once per day.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, grasping hand, light, secret chest; Cost 4,000 gp

Designer, RPG Superstar Judge

Weird. It doesn't just damage a swarm (that would be simple), it stores it for later.

I think it needs to say "however many hp it absorbed from the swarm, that's how many hp the released swarm has."

Name is suitable but silly.

Founder, Legendary Games & Publisher, Necromancer Games, RPG Superstar Judge

Near the bottom of the (top) rankings we found this gem! Again, like a couple others, this thing just has that magic, that mojo. You remember this item. Like on American Idol when Simon says "I won't remember this audition tomorrow," this item is the opposite of that--you WILL (or I will, anyway) remember this item tomorrow. I think this is one of the strongest items in the top 32. Great work, great idea. Another reason this stood out is there were SO MANY crummy swarm items this year I just want to turn this item loose on them all and have it suck them all up! Playing with swarms is a neat idea but so, so, so, so many people did it so poorly. And may I also add this: I love, Love, LOVE the name of this item! Brilliant!

The Exchange Contributor; Publisher, Kobold Press; RPG Superstar Judge

This item has some issues for sure, but it is entertaining and that absolutely counts for something. The more I read it, the more entertained I am, and that's a good sign.

The issues are the grabbing mechanic of "thousands of tongues" grabbing some undefined portion of a swarm. The items doesn't say how that work, such as how many points of swarm does it eat per round? Is there any way for a swarm to defend itself against this? Good concept, not 100% sold on the execution.

Keep these, but watch the mechanics next round!

RPG Superstar 2012 Top 4 , Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 9 aka MillerHero

This item rocks. I want one. Tell me more about the five rounds of being open versus only a single type of swarm being slurped? Does it stay open in case more of the same comes along?

Liberty's Edge Contributor , Star Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 9

Welcome to the Top 32, Jon!

You hit on something that vexes many parties: a limited number of ways to handle swarms. This is a fairly inexpensive way to remove at least most of a swarm, and you've also designed something that can be used as an effective weapon ("Say, what is that frog with the glowing eyes doing in our temple of evilness? Oh damn!"). As a GM, I like to throw swarms at the characters, but I'd love to give them this item in the name of fairness. This is definitely one of my favorite items.

Great work and best of luck to you in future rounds!

Contributor, RPG Superstar 2010 Top 16, 2011 Top 32, 2012 Top 4

First of all, congratulations on making the Top 32! That in itself is a major accomplishment and it’s something you should take great pride in. You rock!

Well, this is a weird one ... and I mostly mean that in a good way. I love the swarm-capturing ability, that's very clever. I'm not exactly sure how the swarm gets captured though. Does it automatically slurp up any swarm of less than 40 hit points with no save? I think it should either deal damage each round to the swarm that represents the total hit points of swarm it slurps up, or the swarm should receive a Will or Reflex save to resist it. Also, I think it would be cooler if when you release the swarm later it's under the owner of the swarm slurper's control. Just a thought. All that said, I like this little swarm-slurping frog. It's very clever and fun. Nice job!

RPG Superstar 2011 Top 32, 2012 Top 4 aka OamuTheMonk

Thematically strong item. I like the look of the item. I like the way it is described as working. I like its described function. The name I'm iffy on, but hey, it's not a dealbreaker for me.

Mechanically, it's a little scattershot. After successfully storing a swarm, it automatically frees the swarm after 10 minutes? Is that right? Seems like an oversight on the creator's part, I wouldn't want this thing in my front pocket when a wasp swarm was automatically released ten minutes after it saved my butt in that horrible wasp swarm battle.

Recommended, just for the thematic elements.

Liberty's Edge Marathon Voter Season 6

I liked this item and voted for it numerable times. I just do not understand how much hp itsucks from the swarm each round?

Silver Crusade

I ran into this item 4 times, while voting and I voted for it 3 times. The 1 time I didn't, was because it ran into another top 32 item that I absolutely loved and the mechanic about releasing the swarm automatically after 10 minutes caused me to give the other item the nod.

Great idea, good luck.

RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9 aka theheadkase

Congratulations!

The theme on this was the selling point. It was tight. Very tight.

The mechanics are lacking as mentioned above.

Once-a-day use, so you HAVE to keep it open for 5 rounds or you don't get the full effect. What happens if you drop it or it is stolen from you?

A grapple or reposition check would be nice against the swarm.

So, even though it is once-a-day use, the mouth re-opens after 10 minutes and releases the swarm? Does this mean the re-opening is considered part of the day's use?

I foresee some hilarious bedtime encounters when a PC forgets to "empty" the thing.

Good luck on the next round, I hope you comb over your Archetype with a fine mechanical tooth comb, but keep your theme abilities!


This item makes me think of Zuma.

I am not convinced about it - it is interesting but at the same time I feel it lacks something I can't exactly pinpoint.

Scarab Sages RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Steven T. Helt

I loved this item. I had little trouble voting for my quicksand cloak over the other items it was paired against, but I found myself wondering how I'd vote if the super-colorful swarm-eating frog showed up in a pairing against my own item. I liked it that much.

I haven't read all the comments yet, but I'll tell you, as a mean and evil GM, that the first use for this thing I thought of was putting a badass swarm in it and leaving it as treasure. Muhahahaha!

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6 aka Breelo Babblebock

Big thanks to Paizo for holding this contest every year. This is my fifth attempt to make it to the top 32. I also want to thank everyone who voted me into the top 89 in votes.

I appreciate all the comments and questions. I will be back to discuss this item further once I have submitted my archetype.

Thanks again everyone!

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Star Voter Season 6 aka Transylvanian Tadpole

You had me at 'translucent tongue-like tendrils of force'. This is one of those items that I can really visualize. Furthermore, disgorging a swarm at your enemies is going to be very satisfying.

Marathon Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Clouds Without Water

I did not like this item. The name was a major turnoff for me, and I did not like it as an easy solution for swarms.

The writing was nice, however.

Dedicated Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9

Never saw this in my voting. Love it to bits, except for the name. But then again, what would you call this thing. Swarm Gulper? Swarm Swallower? Swarm Eater? Maybe Swarm Slurper isn't so bad. Maybe. ;)
Well done Jon,, and I look forward to your round 2 submission...

Contributor, RPG Superstar 2010 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9

Regarding the name, I think it's that the name doesn't say anything about what the object is (a statue) or what it looks like (a frog). However, I love the flavor and the mechanical niche it fills.

Dedicated Voter Season 6

You know, I saw this one in a string of swarm-themed items, so it didn't grab me as much as it would have, had I seen it fresh, but I still remember voting for it. Of all the swarm items, this was definitely my favorite. I definitely agree that the flavor/mojo kicks this item up from "another swarm item" to something Superstar. It's fun, it's got style and attitude, and it does something that I think PCs will find useful.

Glad to hear your working on your Archetype because I can't wait to see what you submit!


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Use the other top 32 broken mirror item to turn yourself into a swarm, get sucked up by the frog statue, put the statue into some sort of stasis container where it won't open, decorate it with gold, and deliver it to the court of your enemy.

To get the Trojan Frog achievement, of course.

Sczarni RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32 , Champion Voter Season 6, Champion Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8, Champion Voter Season 9

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The only thing I did not like about this item is the ambiguity of what happens when the swarm is released.

Star Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8

1 person marked this as a favorite.

From a GM perspective, I really didn't like this item.

This comes close in function to a magic weapon, though I think it's specialized enough to sneak past. However, it's still an auto-win button against swarms since there's no apparent way for a swarm to save against the effect.

The bookkeeping onus for keeping track of how much of the swarm is slurped and running the 10-minute timer likely falls on the GM.

There's a lot of ambiguity in both the slurp and release effects. What does "one type" of swarm mean? All vermin swarms? All wasps, or only hellwasps, or only one specific swarm of hellwasps? If there are several swarms of different types, how does it select which type to slurp? If there are several swarms of the same type within 10 feet, all are of them slurped? Does it slurp a swarm if only part of the swarm is within range? How does the swarm behave when released? What happens if the statue is destroyed while it's full?

Does it work against summoned swarms? Does the slurping suspend the spell's duration until the swarm's released?

Because of the relatively low price at high levels, what's going to stop a PC or NPC from having two or three or a dozen of them and dominating any swarm-based encounter?

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7 aka Demiurge 1138

Centipede swarm, I choose you!

This item is one of those that would be super-fun to use, either as a GM or a player. Congratulations on qualifying, and I'll see you in Round 2!

Dedicated Voter Season 6

This choice of top 32 surprised me. While the effect is useful, I personally felt that the execution hadn't been thought through. I think this item more than any other helps to teach me my main lesson of this year: that the creative idea is far more important than the execution, especially to the judges.

Well done, and congratulations!

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Locke1520

Congratulations on making it to the top 32. Names can be tricky things every time I saw this while voting I expected to hate it but never really did conceptually it was too cool! I did down vote it a number of times because of some missing mechanics (especially: How do I deal 40 points of damage to a swarm with this?) but otherwise this is a pretty good item.

If you are more meticulous in your execution and careful of what mechanics you cut from your entries you could do very well. I'm looking forward to your round 2 entry.

Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 9

Jon, congratulations!

I'm torn on your item. It's kinda neat, though I don't see it being super useful, because it's price is at a level where PCs don't have that much trouble dealing with swarms already. A few area spells, and you're done. You don't need to suck up a swarm and spit it out again later.

RPG Superstar 2011 Top 32 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8 aka Isaac Duplechain

It was one of my favorite items. In my personal Top 5.

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka RainyDayNinja

Since you've designed your item to perfectly counter mine, I suppose that makes us each other's greatest nemesises... nemesi... nemese... What's the plural on that one?

Anyway, I agree with SKR's comment, as well as the question regarding how long it takes to eat up a swarm. It's a cool idea (and druid-friendly, since it's strictly catch-and-release), but with some mechanical issues that could use ironing out. Congrats!

RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9 aka GM_Solspiral

The Good: One of the few items that makes me smile at its whimsy and still strikes me as a wirthy item. I'm hard to please, you pleased me and made me laugh, so kudos!

The Bad: Do not like the auto-release after 10 minutes thing. IT was not needed in my opinion and made your item lose a little shine in my eyes.

The Ugly: Its a lame move but intentionally or not I see allot of DMs just deciding not to use swarms once they are aware you have one of these. The ones that do it intentionally are just crap DMs the ones that do it unintentionally because they are trying to challenge a party are just following human nature. This is why I upvoted you 4 times and down voted you twice (though against great items.)

Was surprised to learn you ranked 85th, didn't have you in my top 32 but you were "just a little outside." Glad the judges rewarded you with top 32 taking another look makes me appreciate this item a little more. Props and Congrats are in order.

Scarab Sages RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Steven T. Helt

Holy monkey...the guy that designed my other favorite item is also in Oklahoma, too. That's just.....weird.


I'll be honest, when I first started reading this I was turned off... but by the time I had finished with your entry I was totally sold! This is one loathesome craven idol, a wonderfully viscious and fantasticly fun item to add to any campaign.

This is a GREAT item, well thought out and balanced, delightfully described and orchestrated. As GM_Solspiral says, it has just the right amount of whimsy, something I feel is very important in Pathfinder.

I could see this being both an item found in a horde (loaded with a swarm - suprise!), and something a crafty player uses at just the right time. And with the right GM I could also see this becoming a central plot item to an entire campaign. Thank you for creating this gem, and consider it yoinked for at least one Kingmaker Campaign -- I'll definitely be putting one of these into the mix for my game. Bravo!

Editor, Jon Brazer Enterprises , Dedicated Voter Season 6

I like the name, actually. I don't mind a heavy dose of silliness in my games, though. I play these games to have fun, and if it's all sturm und drang seriousness, I generally have a harder time doing that.

The concept is brilliant, but not explaining exactly how many hp are absorbed per round is a big, big misstep. The grammar and formatting are quite good, though. I hope to see some really great stuff out of this designer in the near future.


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Jabberwonky wrote:
I could see this being both an item found in a horde (loaded with a swarm - suprise!)

Only if it's been in the hoard less than ten minutes. :P

The ten-minute time limit works against the item's coolness, IMO. I'd rather have the swarm stay in there indefinitely, but you can't use the item again until it's been released. And I really hate the name.

RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 aka motteditor

RonarsCorruption wrote:
You don't need to suck up a swarm and spit it out again later.

You may not need to, but you may WANT to!


Jon,

I like the flavor of this item. It's quirky, kinda fun, and there's some creativity here. It didn't break away from the middle of the pack for me though, for a lot of the issues that have already been brought up by the judges and other posters. Best of luck in the second round, and congratulations!

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2008 Top 32, 2011 Top 16 , Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka JoelF847

I hadn't seen this one before, so it was a treat reading it just now. Very cool effect, but some gaping holes mechanically. Aside from not having any way to resist the effect, what happens with a swarm that has more than 40 hp? Does the swarm lose 40 hp? Does the released 40 hp of swarm later get treated as a normal swarm of its type, but with only 40 hp? It would seem weird for a tough swarm with 80 hp to get the captured parts released with 40 hp and otherwise be at full strength. You could look at it as having half the hp, the young creature template, or something to diminish it's abilities in line with the lower hp.

Also, when released, where does the swarm go? in the statue's square? Can the user determine where it appears (presumably up to 10 feet away)?

I'm also not sold on the price. At 8k, it's pretty hefty price for something used against swarms, which most often are lower level threats. I'd rather see a one shot use version that's cheaper so a lower level party could use it when swarms are still dangerous to the PCs.

Star Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8 aka Gio

I didn't see this item during the voting phase, which is a shame! This is great! What an awesome item Jon!. Good luck on your archetype!

And, oh, congratulations!

Scarab Sages RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Steven T. Helt

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I immediately ignored the 10 minute duration in favor of trapping treasure hoards with hellwasp and frost mite swarms.

Star Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9

I don't know...

It seems pricey for a swarm deterent. Once per day use?
Would you use it more than once per adventure very often?

It seems like an interesting idea, and I give Kudos for that, but I feel (IMHO only) it could have been implemented/designed better.

Dark Archive

Great concept, loved the item.

I look forward to what you have in store for the 2nd round.

Good luck with the archetype I expect good things.

Star Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9

Congratulations Jon,

I liked the flavor on this one a lot. I think the 10 minute limit ruined it for GMs wanting to put in a hoard, but that is easy to fix. It dinnae make my keep folder just because the mechanics were missing so much (can a swarm even survive in an extra-dimensional space for 10 minutes?). Most have been addressed up thread, so I will not repeat them. Still this is a fun item at its core.

Suggestion for R2 (& I realize this is coming too late): fill in those mechanical holes.

Good luck and congratulations.

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6 aka Breelo Babblebock

Thanks for all the comments and critiques. I am going to get some much needed rest and then share my designer's notes for the swarm slurper tomorrow.

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6 aka Breelo Babblebock

Now that I have had a chance to rest and recharge, I thought I would take the opportunity to talk about the evolution of the swarm slurper. Hopefully this is helpful to you in some way. If not, at least you will understand how I think.

I've entered this contest 5 out of last 6 years and only managed to make the keeper folder last year. Each time I have entered an item, I have tried to create an item that is unlike anything currently in existence. My tendency is to concentrate on items that solve problems I have encountered while gaming or GMing. I'm a computer engineer by trade so I think it makes sense that I try to "engineer" fixes to the game I love to play.

This year I tried to come up with a solution for dealing with the Fine and Diminutive swarms. Encountering one of these swarm at lower levels can be deadly especially if your party doesn't have a lot of area of effect spells or abilities. Here is a look at how I attempted to solve the problem.

Step 1: What is the problem? (Here I list all of the issues that could affect the solution)

Problem #1: Fine and Diminutive swarms are immune to weapon damage.
Problem #2: Fine and Diminutive swarms can only be harmed by spells or items that deal area of effect damage.
Problem #3: Damaging swarms with area of effect spells or items could also damage players or allies.
Problem #4: Swarms sometimes have high movement rates so running away is not always an option.

Next post....
Step 2: What are the possible solutions?

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6 aka Breelo Babblebock

Step 2: What are the possible solutions?

First, I did my research to find out if there was an existing solution to the problem as defined. I looked at every spell and magic item in every book I owned to make sure I wasn't solving a problem that had already been solved. Check.

Next, I fully researched swarms. I learned everything I could about swarms including the "Worm that walks" template in Bestiary 2. I went through all three bestiaries and all the swarms found in the other books I own. Check.

Finally, I started brainstorming. Here is a snapshot of some of the things that came to mind.

"I could create an item that somehow does area of effect damage without harming the players caught in the effect....Yeah, but that is boring."

"I could create an item that uses a gust of wind effect to take out the swarm with non-lethal damage..... Nope, won't work for aquatic swarms."

"I could create an item that reverses the gust of wind effect to vacuum up the swarm into an extra-dimensional space. I could even make it a bag that looks like an aardvark..... Nope, no way to control what gets vacuumed up and it is too-close to a real-world device. Who wants a vacuum cleaner for a magic item? And who wants to empty a bag of dead swarms?"

"Now putting the swarm into an extra-dimensional space without harming other players is a pretty cool idea, but how do I do it?"

Next post...
Step 3: Develop the solution.

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6 aka Breelo Babblebock

Step 3: Develop the solution.

First, I went back to my books and looked for a spell that grabs things without damaging them. Hello grasping hand. Extra-dimensional space? Hello, secret chest. I'll use grasping hand to grab the swarm and secret chest to store it.

Next, I had to figure out how it worked. I decided to use tendrils of force to grab the individual creatures and deposit them into the extra-dimensional space. It wasn't long afterwards that I decided on frog-shaped device with tongues of force.

Step 4: Flesh out the details.

How much should this cost?

This will be more useful to low-level characters than high-level characters. Try to keep it under 10,000gp.

What is the range of the tongues?

Grasping hand is based on interposing hand. I will set the range of the tongues to be 10 feet to match the size of the interposing hand.

What is the duration of the effect?

Interposing hand has a duration of 1 round/level. Check.

How many tongues should there be?

Since there are 10,000 creatures in a Fine swarm, there should be thousands of tongues.

Next post....
Step 4: Flesh out the details. (continued)

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6 aka Breelo Babblebock

Step 4: Flesh out the details. (continued)

How much of a swarm can it hold?

Hmmmm.... this is an interesting question. Each swarm has varying hit dice and constitution modifiers. It would make more sense to pick a number of hit points rather than choose hit dice. I went back through all the swarms and picked a value in the middle. The swarm slurper can hold 40 hit points of swarms.

How much of a swarm can it capture in one round?

Another interesting question.... We have 10,000 creatures versus the hand-waved thousands of tongues. I have seen Animal Planet and National Geographic showing the incredible speed of a frog/lizard tongue. So if a tongue can grab a single creature in a less than a second, then the tongues in the swarm slurper should be able to grab all 10,000 creatures in a 6 second round assuming all 10,000 creatures are within range at the beginning of the round it is activated. So, it could grab up to 40 hit points in a round.

(I realize now that this point was not clarified in the item description... a failure in my writing and not my design.)

What happens to the swarm after it is captured?

I definitely don't want to have to deal with dead swarms so there are really only two options:

1: Keep the swarm and release it before it begins to die.
2: Put the swarm in stasis and release it at any time.

Next post....
What to do with the captured swarm.

RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6 aka Breelo Babblebock

Step 4: Flesh out the details. (continued)

What happens to the swarm after it is captured?

I liked option of putting the swarm in stasis much better. However, doing this would require the casting of a temporal stasis spell.

This decision to create the stasis effect inside the extra-dimensional space was going to significantly increase the price of the item. The material component alone is 5,000gp in powdered gems.

I decided that I would allow the swarm slurper to keep a swarm up to 10 minutes before automatically releasing it. It was a tough choice.

Should the swarm get a saving throw to avoid this effect? If so, then what should the save be?

I initially planned on putting in a standard Reflex save against the grasping hand spell but I changed my mind. In this case, I thought that even if an individual tongue happened to miss hitting an individual creature, then it would not be very long before another tongue hit the same creature. After six seconds, the tongues would overwhelm the creatures before they could escape the area.

It might have been better to add haste and true strike to the construction requirements. I should have also updated the description to better indicate the lightning fast strikes of the tongues.

Next post....
Step 4: Flesh out the details. (continued)

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