RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16
,
Star Voter Season 6
|
| 5 people marked this as a favorite. |
Spell-Winding Timepiece
Aura strong universal; CL 13th
Slot none; Price 25,000 gp; Weight —
Description
This ornate platinum pocketwatch has a brass hour hand, silver minute hand, and golden second hand. Despite the presence of a winding knob, it never needs winding and always keeps accurate time. The bearer can wind a spell-winding timepiece as a standard action. Winding the timepiece causes the durations of active spell effects that target the bearer to be reset, as if the spells had been re-cast just as the timepiece was wound. Only spells with a duration based on caster level and measured in rounds, minutes, or hours are affected. The duration is reset only for the bearer, not for any other targets of the original spells. Spell effects from magic items and spell-like abilities are likewise not reset.
A spell-winding timepiece can be wound once per day with no risk. If it is wound more than once per day, there is a 25% cumulative chance per use past the first that the delicate clockwork will be ruined, permanently destroying the device.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, Extend Spell, limited wish; Cost 12,250 gp
I'd like a little more language clarifying this thing's effects, but in general I like the concept.
OK, this thing is great. Interesting and fun, this plays with a mechanic that I've not seen done so elegantly--spell duration. And it breaks a few "rules" doing it--the cliche timepiece is so often just a lame disaster but here it is great, and the old school % chance to be destroyed is normally something I would say to avoid (up there with random effects) but I absolutely LOVE the interaction that has with this item. It totally fits its theme of this cherished watch you just dont want to over-wind. I really like this. Again, kids pay attention. This is mojo.
My spellcasting characters will henceforth set aside 25k in anticipation of this item being published. It seems like every time you ask the GM how much time has elapsed since the casting of your spell, the answer is always a few rounds/minutes/hours after the duration of your spell.
|
Contributor
,
Star Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 9
|
Welcome to the Top 32, Charlie!
I love well-done "timey wimey" items, and this is certainly no exception. You especially avoided the common pitfall of forcing the GM and players to unravel a previous round's (or worse) actions. The effect is very specific (if slightly abusable, albeit mitigated by the cumulative destruction chance), and I like how it attacks the "if I could just keep this effect for more than one encounter" conundrum that comes up during many games. Due in part to my biases, this is my favorite item of the round.
Best of luck to you in the contest!
First of all, congratulations on making the Top 32! That in itself is a major accomplishment and it’s something you should take great pride in. You rock!
This item is very cool. Re-setting a spell's duration is a new and very interesting design space to exploit. I think you pulled it off too! I think the limited wish spell requirement is spot-on and helps mitigate player abuse. Though you might need to raise the gp cost a little too. This is a simple, very clever concept you've come up with. Well done! Best of luck in the archetype round!
I generally did not like the time themed items I came across, but this one stood out the few times I saw it. It was almost an immediate up vote. Congrats on this concept and you're advancement.
I like the description, a lot. I can picture this thing and I immediately feel attached to it. Honestly, before I even read the thing all the way through I was thinking "Whoa...better not wind this thing too much!" You nailed it thematically and descriptively.
The mechanics are good with the reservations about abuse. I would think with the limited wish prerequisite that this would only target beneficial spells targeting the person, but that is a minor gripe.
I would have liked a line break between the paragraphs, but again, I'm nitpicking. Probably because this is so well done that all I can do is nitpick.
Congratulations again.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
I can say that this is one of the items that I voted up and down, depending upon the other item.
Like Wolfgang I have that feeling that this item is ripe for abuse (ok, checking, time stop won't be rewound because it's duration is not caster level based). I think that it could be rewriten a bit to be more clear and streamlined. Still it's nice item so good luck Charlie in following rounds.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
This was a regular upvote for me, and a near keep. Only the % chance of ruin on overuse kept it from my keep pile.
Nicely done, in a tough area of the game to compete in.
I voted against this item, because the combinations .) are just too rife for abuse.
Cool item but way too powerful. I like mages, but this is essentially a slotless extend without the level adjustment.
Charlie, so proud of you brother and so deserved. This was a great entry and I am looking forward to your next entry. All the Way!
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Like others, I'm a bit worried about abuse here, though I think you did take some smart steps to try to prevent that. Still, if I played casters more often, this would definitely be high on my list of things to look for.
I'll also say it feels a bit anachronistic to me. I know Golarion's got more sci-fi elements than a lot of fantasy worlds, but this feels almost steampunk to me. Personally, I'd probably convert it to an hourglass if I were to add it to a campaign, but that's just a personal bias on my part.
Congrats, Charlie! I'm happy to see you in the competition, and I still remember you from running my very first Pathfinder Society experience as a GM at PaizoCon 2009. I'm interested to see where you go from here. So, best of luck.
Thematically it's a bit bland. It's a watch that alters time, like dozens of similar items throughout pop culture. So that feels like a chestnut. The mechanic is refined pretty well, it's not confusing or convoluted. I feel like the 25% chance is meaningless because a player will simply never wind it that second time. A much smaller chance of failure every time it's wound means it won't become a daily-use item. I don't hate it, but I'm not excited about it.
@Neil: NC fistbump! Here's hoping I can continue our state's fine Superstar tradition!
You've definitely got the inside track just based on the track record of folks who share your geography. Go get'em, man! You're on my short list of folks to root for this year.
RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32
,
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
aka Steven T. Helt
|
I never got to vote for this item, but that's not what bothers me. What bothers me is I didn't get a chance to see this thing before I played a 20th-level time oracle at Gen Con!
There is opportunity for abuse here, but still, Pathfinder needs more manipulation of time and spell duration so this is an instant favorite for me. Next time I have an awesome character idea, I'll ask what you're thinking, just in case we share a brain.
In which case it's clear I'm the "special" relative.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
I have to say, I don't like this item, largely because of the potential for abuse. Casters could almost indefinitely keep certain spell effects active upon themselves at all times, without actually needing to sacrifice spells each day. For instance, Mind Blank is a pretty common upkeep spell, yet, with the watch, a Wizard need only prepare it once, and then each day he just winds the watch and gaining his spell slot back.
At the same time, someone could keep someone under spell effects like Charm Person or Dominate Person indefinitely by forcing them to wind the watch.
The above are relatively minor abuses one could do, and the first that popped into my head, but they are examples of how the watch could be used. Anyway, you made it to the top 32, so congratulations on your achievement. I hope your further submissions are better received by myself than this one was.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
It won't work on extended mansion because mansion does not target a creature. Nor will it work with mind blank as its duration is not based on caster level. It will work on foresight.
I'd disagree--in fact, the whole thing smacks of Alkenstar (clockwork attempt to tame chaotic elements of magic through technology) or Azlant (clockwork constructs) without being anchored to the setting.
Those are certainly fair points. I suppose if you've got guns in Alkenstar (or robots in Numeria, for that matter), it's not that far a stretch. Like I said, just a personal thing that's not up my alley, but that's not a reflection on Charlie's item.
I, too, had kind of a gut-feeling that this was somehow ripe for abuse and the first few times I saw it, it smacked more of stereotype than innovation. It did grow on me over time, though (bad pun totally intended).
Congrats on making the Top 32 and I can't wait to see what you have for next round!
It won't work on extended mansion because mansion does not target a creature. Nor will it work with mind blank as its duration is not based on caster level. It will work on foresight.
Thanks for pointing that out Drejek. I have deleted that post and amended it.
Congratulations.
Interesting item but it basically is a variant Improved Greater Rod of Extend Spell CL17th which seems more easily abused in play especially at higher level play or games where day long spell effects can be managed rather routinely. In many ways it works better than a Greater Rod of Meta magic Extend Spell with a daily mechanic usage that can be slightly gamed since it works for all PCs not just a spell caster after the fact. I thought it was odd how it could tell the difference between a spell cast my a non magic item, supernatural ability and spell caster.
Could be pretty major party buffing item and kind of broken in that capacity at the price when there is a way to get extended spells and "spell effects" with long durations in play could basically make some of them semi-permanent to permanent at the cost of use each day.
Usable less often reliably, but in more situations by every party member.
The way it seems to be written up it will extend a spell that is already extended. Again and again for lengthy duration day long spells.
Usable 1/Day and 2/Day doable pretty reliably with a "Luck" spell, Luck Feat(s) and or Luck Stone by Anyone without the Extend Spell Feat or even actual spell caster.
IMO it will primarily be used on the high level spells and more expensive spell material component spells like Stone Skin if it is renewing the spell it should reset total damage. Not limited to the caster casting the original spell. IMO it is cheap for what it does.
An Extended Foresight of 3+ Hours with a Rod becomes 6+ Hours. With the right magic spells, items and or feats. Someone like a Rogue can have Foresight Up for 9+ Hours a day so no party surprises and "Safe" adventuring.
I expect your archetype will be interesting.
Charlie,
Congratulations on making it through. Yours was the only time related item I saw that was not poorly done or just a giant pain in the butt for the GM to adjudicate. The mechanics are clean and simple and make for a well done and desirable item. Good luck in the next round.
|
RPG Superstar 2008 Top 32, 2011 Top 16
,
Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
aka JoelF847
|
This is a pretty cool item - I agree that it seems pretty powerful, especially as you go up in level and can have a LOT of spells active on yourself at the same time. It might be better balanced if you could use it three times per day, but each use you picked a specific spell effect.
That being said, as written, it affects ALL spells on you that qualify, so using it in the middle of a combat could be tricky if there's some enemy spells on you at the same time as all of your buffs that you want to re-set.
|
RPG Superstar 2008 Top 32, 2011 Top 16
,
Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
aka JoelF847
|
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
I can't think of where I might buy this over a pearl of power?
For when you've got 10 buff spells up, and want to renew them all at once?
I think my alchemist might like one. :)
Good luck on future rounds!
|
RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32
,
Dedicated Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
aka Steven T. Helt
|
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
I'd take away the self-destruct but allow it to only affect one spell at a time, once per day.
It's useful over a pearl of power in that it affects any spell cast one you, instead of only a specific level or lower, and because it extends a spell you've already cast. So it doesn't require a second expensive component, or a separate standard action, etc. Suppose planar adaptation or life bubble expiring will actually kill you in a single round for some reason. The timepiece saves you, whereas the pearl of power is waiting for someone to find your body and take it!
This is a neat item, and it definitely stood out from the pack of timey-wimey items.
Congratulations, and I'll see you in Round 2!
I can't think of where I might buy this over a pearl of power?
I like the way you think. That is definitely how we judges look at items even if we don't mention it specifically in our comments. That is a very helpful way to evaluate your item.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
As prior entries will tell you, Template Fu is one mean point eating machine, but will also praise where praise is due.
These reviews being this in depth usually take me a while to do and they get fitted in around other demands on my time, so please bear with me if I haven’t gotten to your item yet. I will get there in the end.
There are a couple of feedback categories that are easy to score high on as I do like everyone to get a good grade somewhere, conversely, there are also some categories that will sting everyone – you have been warned ;)
Review Caveat: I try to keep things totally dispassionate and all comments herein are my own. Having not made the illustrious levels that you have achieved this year, I can only caveat that anything I propose in feedback may not be totally in line with what Paizo thinks or needs of its freelance game designers, so do consider carefully any and all feedback I make under this light.
I start your review with…
Congratulations on being selected by the public at large and then the stalwart judges!
Review Breakdown:
Template: 5/5
Hungry! Staying Hungry!
This is good, even the construction capitalising the feats but not the spells, used italics, an emdash too – sure signs that you did some research on the template – big props and 5 out of 5!
Spelling: 4/5
Everyone should know to use US English, so you just know that I am going to eat points for stray ‘u’ letters and similar.
Pocket <space> watch – pocketwatch is not a valid word.
Readability: 4/5
For me, I believe the rule system target comprehension level is 11 year olds and up, so I have included this to review everyone’s entry using the MS Word Grammar scoring system, which measures passivity, and the reading scores that determine age comprehension. Then using my self appointed expectation of target comprehension level, I have tried to score everyone consistently in this category as it is an area whereby I can mathematically deduce a score.[/i]
Passive Sentences 44% (- 1 pt)
There are whole threads on this and it is possible to get 0%, which is wicked, but I would expect scores of less than 20% to be around the ideal mark for item descriptions (sometimes, you need the passive, but only rarely).
Flesch Reading Ease 60.4 (no points deducted for 60+, you just squeaked in!)
(0-30 best understood by university graduates, 60-70 easily understood by 13-15 year olds, 90-100 easily understood by 11 year olds)
Flesh-Kincaid Grade Level 9.3 (nice!)
(This equates to the grades found in the US schooling system, e,g. 8.2 means it should be understandable by the average 8th grade student)
Me as a Designer Review: 4/5
Simple but effective intro – but you could think a little more beyond. The bit that made me think this is when you say “always keeps accurate time.”, the designer mode within me kicked in and postulated, “does this mean, if I change plane of existence that I know what the time is on Golarion core, or does the watch change it’s face representation to match the time periods of where I am currently existing”. For me, that would have enhanced the cool.
The default item activation action is a standard action, so most often, you don’t need to state it is a standard action, you need only state when it isn’t.
I didn’t get why it only affects spells with duration affected by caster level – if a spell has a duration of say 1 hour flat, as opposed to 1 hour per caster level, still be able to be reset? I think what you could have said here and this making the item and sentence structure more game term specific and save a load of words and at the same time give the maximum versatility is to say that “Only spells with duration greater than instantaneous are affected”. But that’s just me.
It took me two reads to register the word “active” in your description (this may be my slow old brain though, so I’m not deducting anything here.
I don’t know if it were intentional, but I quite like that the time piece doesn’t discern between harmful and beneficial affects on the bearer, however, I did wonder if it might have been better to make it such that the caster of a duration based spell must be the bearer and must choose which duration based spell that they cast to affect rather than all spells. It would reduce somewhat the potential for abuse.
Spell selection, I can see why you went with limited wish, but I do wonder if time stop would have been a better and thematically tighter choice for this item.
Template Fu continues to contentedly snooze away his meals from elsewhere but the mean designer in me says, it could have done with maybe one more period of waiting and then returning to for one last review, the spell selection is why I deny you another 5/5. Yes, I am mean sometimes.
Overall Impression: 5/5
There was excellent attention and execution of the template indeed (so much so, I privately hope some of it came from reading my template thread from last year, one can but hope).
The name was illustrative and for me quite evocative and also a good reminder to what the item does when on your character sheet, I wish I were as good at naming as this.
The item gave me food for thought, and it was a little wall of wordy on that first paragraph when sized to match the line word width of a rule book, but that being said, I think this is very close to a perfect entry for me, so I am going to give you 5/5 for the overall impression and feel of this entry.
Final Score: 22/25
I won’t give a final score comment as I haven’t reviewed all the items in this detail yet, I suggest that if it interests, you can watch as I progress through the items to see your final placement in my review scoring system.
Closing, as I started…
Congratulations on being selected!
|
RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16
,
Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
aka Locke1520
|
Congratulations! Like others I felt this could be abused, however, I also think that you found an elegant and interesting way to play with time effects. Best of luck in round two.
Congrats on being selected, and I have to say: this is a very interesting item, though without a little more of a cap I worry it might be unbalanced (ie: resetting the duration of time stop). Fortunately, a little balance is overruled by the sheer creativity of the item. Making something that plays with the rules in a new and creative way is tough, but you hit that nail on the head.
| 5 people marked this as a favorite. |
I can't think of where I might buy this over a pearl of power?I like the way you think. That is definitely how we judges look at items even if we don't mention it specifically in our comments. That is a very helpful way to evaluate your item.
Yep, that was how I was looking at this item as well.
In addition to all the other goodies you get with this item in doubling shorter-term buffs, you can also use it to have extended hour/level spells up on yourself forever, which makes it a little better than a gaggle of Pearls of Power if you want to have those spells each day because it allows you to not even prepare the spells at all, whereas Pearl of Power you have to prepare it but you get two of them.
The item only gets more powerful with the more extended Hour/Level spells you have up on you starting at level 12 because you can have them all up permanently as well. Mage armor, water breathing, planar adaptation, resurgent transformation, delay poison (becoming immune to all poison because it is delayed forever), life bubble, ward of the season, nondetection, darkvision, ant haul, overland flight, lose the trail, eagle soul (as long as you don't activate the kicker), pass without trace, animal shapes, blessing of the watch, bloodhound, countless eyes, deadeye's lore, raiment of command, longstrider, delay pain, tireless pursuit, and ride the waves are the ones I could find.
So if look at a few big ones off the list, with permanent high caster-level nondetection we are superior to the Amulet of Proof against Detection and Location (costs 35,000 gold), with permanent darkvision, we are equivalent to Goggles of the Night (costs 12,000 gold), with permanent overland flight, we are superior to the Broom of Flying (17,000 gold and only 9 hours a day) and much much more (including Necklace of Adaptation due to life bubble). All that, and you can also use it to extend your short-duration spells too, as long as you always remember to use it once a day. It's likely to be better than Pearls of Power just for the doubling of short duration spells while in the dungeon (assuming that you would otherwise need to prepare two copies of each).
Based on this analysis, the item is at the very least extremely undercosted (honestly I wouldn't allow it in my campaign as anything less than an artifact), though if I was a developer working on this item, I would likely insert a clause that stated that no single spell may have its duration reset by this item more than once and curb all that stuff.
Now all that said, it was an interesting idea. I voted against this item every time I saw it due to balance issues (essentially that I thought it should be an artifact based on its power level), but you clearly have what it takes to design something quite interesting. To win me back, you're going to have to bring your A-game--use all that creativity from the timepiece but also show me in the archetype round that you're particularly taking an eye toward balance. I'm looking forward to seeing what you create!
Time-altering items are a hard sell, and some very flawed watches and clocks came through in my pairings during the voting. I don't recall ever seeing this one, but I'd probably have voted for it if it did come up.
The submission is well-written and the mechanics are clearly outlined without being overly burdensome to adjudicate during play. I like that you built in a drawback for excessive usage that is easy to apply and isn't a negligible consideration.
I didn't see this one originally, but I really like it. I was trying to do something with clockworks as well initially, but I couldn't seem to get anything that didn't fall into many of the "timepiece traps" that Clark has warned about in the past. This is a neat item that is tight mechanically. Would my PCs purchase it? Probably not. Would they love to find it in a treasure pile and absolutely rock it! Definitely.
The Good: Reset button for spell duration, yes please!
The Bad: You imply you're messing with time in the name and you sort of are but that kind of thing gets snap judgements when voter fatigue sets in.
The Ugly: Unclear mechanics, can you use this on other people's spells?
Overall: Congrats on making the top 32.
Definitely an interesting item and I'm glad to see it earned a spot in the Top 32.
Best of luck.
Congratulations Charlie,
I like that you messed with duration. I like that it takes a second, later standard action to use (a metamagic rod would not) I do not like that it affects hours- duration, but that is minor (and really glad the days were prohibited :). I think narrowing it to the target only and only to caster level spells was a very smart move.
My advice for R2? Step up the flavor. While no more is necessary for your item, I want to feel the archetype oozing River Kingdoms :)
Congratulations and nice job.
My spellcasting characters will henceforth set aside 25k in anticipation of this item being published. It seems like every time you ask the GM how much time has elapsed since the casting of your spell, the answer is always a few rounds/minutes/hours after the duration of your spell.
I think that has a lot to do with the vagueness of time in a module. Yes combat is measured in 6 second increments but when it comes to searching, talking, fart-arsing around the player/character time spent can get confusing. If you were to sit down and time a basic dungeon crawl round by round you might find that they've gone through the entire place in about 20 minutes. But that doesn't factor in the time spent picking one's nose while waiting for someone to volunteer to open that rather obvious door, or getting into position to lift up that heavy beam lying on that poor goblin you need to get coherent answers out of. So GM's make a guess that's long enough to make sure rounds/level are finished, minutes/level are being pushed and hours are still passing by.
As for the item. I love it. It isn't a must have but it's a nice to have and will make anyone who needs buffing spells to be effective consider it strongly.